Downs with Dancing
by JVS on Aug.24, 2008, under 2008
Often when I officiate a marriage I’ll open with a prayer asking God to make himself known to the soon-to-be-wedded couple; to show them that they really are saying their vows ‘before him and all these people.’ Seems that God sometimes answers that prayer in strange ways; in we-can’t-seem-to-get-our-Down-Syndrome-son-off-the-dance-floor kinds of ways…
Normally Edward doesn’t come to the weddings I do. This time he had to – in order to allow my wife Fran to attend (the bride insisted that both of them come). We were both worried that having him there would be burdensome (for him and us). I think Fran would have much preferred to stay home. But she came.
Fifteen minutes after the ceremony ended – as we both wondered how long Edward would hold up – a young woman came over and asked if she could talk to Eddy. She used to be a caregiver for another disabled child (who had recently died). Within minutes she and Edward were jumping on a nearby trampoline (it was a backyard service); she in a summer dress and Eddy in shorts.
An hour later another woman introduced herself. She used to work with disabled kids. She had a great visit with Edward. During dinner, still another young woman came over and asked Edward if he’s be interested in a dance later on. She worked with siblings of disabled individuals. Edward accepted.
Boy did he accept. At one point during the evening, after dancing with the bride, Edward was dancing with 4 girls (at once). When it came time to leave, we had to drag him off the dance floor.
What a gift that evening was for us. As parents of a special needs child you often wonder about your son’s relational future. Will he have real friends? A special friend? Real relationships? Will he ever go to a dance and really want to be danced with?
The answer to that last question – evidently – is a resounding ‘Yes!’ Before leaving that night, one of the young girls (connected to the child who died) asked if she could maybe take Edward out once in a while (to the movies, respite care type stuff). We were thrilled at her offer. A few days ago she made contact, seeking to follow up.
This brought tears to our eyes.
For a couple struggling with how to find that kind of care for their boy, she was truly an answer to prayer.
